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Why We Can’t ‘Get Over It’ – Part 4 Blessed are the Cracked

Part 4 in the Blessed are the Cracked series begun in November, 2017. 

Ever wonder why some skin sores don’t heal properly? 

wound skinDiabetes, poor circulation, inadequate nutrition and infection are some factors that inhibit skin healing. That’s why wound care is a specialty in the healthcare field. The efficacy of wound care management became personal when my late father developed grievous skin sores. Medical expertise coupled with appropriate ointments and protocols can foster complete healing. Wound care requires a trained specialist able to recognize whether infection is present and needs to go. 

Yet, when someone has bedsores or weeping skin ulcers, we don’t comment, “It’s been awhile now. Can’t you just get over it?”

Healing a broken heart follows a similar recovery process.

Often when years pass and we continue feeling sensitive over a certain issue, we may think this kind of thought about ourselves or others. Why can’t they just get over it? I’m sorry to admit I’ve thought this. You don’t do this, of course, but you’ve heard it said.

Don’t you think they would if they could? Like a skin wound, complete emotional recovery is inhibited if something buried deep remains embedded, undiagnosed and untreated.

♥⇒⇒⇒One key to recognizing that healing is incomplete: if an area remains slightly tender to the touch. When that subject arises, are you touchy? 

♥♥⇒⇒⇒ Would you rather avoid situations centering on that topic? 

Exposing the Lies

The key to unlocking total and thorough emotional healing is to expose the lies that entered our thoughts and attached themselves to that wound during those wounded moments. Recognizing the lies and calling them out of the shadows into the light of truth is essential. 

Bible BrianHardin quote mirror darkness

Imagine Jesus standing beside you, beaming, radiant, holy. His goodness is evident in the way He looks at you, His eyes gleaming with love, acceptance and love. See Him wearing a breastplate emblazoned with a golden T, like Superman’s S. Jesus is TRUTH personified. 

Take each lie you accepted and look at it in the light of Jesus’s Presence. Does it line up with what He says about you? Would Jesus tell you that? 

The answer is a resounding “NO!”

Because emotional healing is a profoundly personal encounter with the living God, we need to hear Jesus speak to us. The voice of Truth is the only voice capable of depowering a lie and breaking its attachment to our soul. That’s why I adore Casting Crown’s song  Voice of Truth.  But the voice of truth tells me a different story. Out of all the voices calling out to me, I will choose to listen and believe the voice of truth.” 

Renouncing Tacit Agreement

Next, renounce your agreement with that lie. But I don’t recall agreeing with any lies, you say. Me neither, friend. We unknowingly agree with any lie by failing to see it and take action against it. Like a snake that slithers under a door without weather-stripping, lies enter fast and silently, hiding under the nearest piece of furniture while you were in another room. You didn’t see it enter or you’d have dealt with it. Tacit agreement is agreement that is understood without being openly expressed. It is implied, unvoiced, unspoken and silent. 

truth lieA real life example of a lie that attached itself to my soul (mind, will and emotions) concerned baby showers. Motherhood has been a minefield of sorts for me. Surrendering my only child for adoption, the pain of not conceiving for years afterwards, followed by a failed adoption attempt left me scarred. My dream of raising a child to adulthood remains unfulfilled. The lie was ” I am inadequate.” Consequently, I avoided baby showers as a coping mechanism. About six years ago, a major breakthrough occurred in that I enjoyed my friend Michelle’s shower in every respect. It was wonderful! No vestiges of jealousy or sadness anywhere in sight. 

Two years later I attended another baby shower, but this time my discomfort returned. Comparison and inadequacy lurked behind ebullient conversations of breastfeeding and sleepless nights. Hard as I tried, I had little in common with these universal mothering experiences and it bothered me. Although feeling out-of-place, I suppressed my vexation out of deep affection for the mother-to-be as it was her day. It wasn’t about me. Life rolled on. I forgot about that wound.

But the Lord in His mercy would not allow me to suppress my way through life. Another baby event occurred last week. I skipped it. Avoidance had become my comfortable fallback coping mechanism. When I mentioned why I skipped it to my husband, he responded with, “Isn’t it about time you just got over it, Kate?”

He was right. I tacitly agreed with the lie that I was an incapable nurturer. Every  woman alive who raised children was superior to me in the mothering department or so I thought (hyperbole). It harbored deep within me, expanding over time. I fostered it like a dependant child. But once I saw it for what it is — a simple sentence denouncing my agreement was all it took to break its grip. 

I recommend repeating this process for each lie as Holy Spirit brings them to the surface. For me, this lie breaking plays out as a process rather than a single event. Not realizing it would happen this way, in my impatience I wanted to pray one prayer, wipe my hands and be done. But gentle Jesus knows our fragile psyches can handle only small doses of unearthing per sitting, so He designs individual treatment plans for us. 

May I pray for you?

Jesus statue happyGentle Jesus, I bring this intricately crafted reader before you, designed in Your very image asking You to shine Your soft white light on each lie embedded in their hearts as a result of inflicted wounds.  

Grant them courage to look at it, perspective to view it through Your eyes from Your vantage point, realizing You’d never speak that to them or over them. 

Grant them strength to renounce their tacit agreement, ask forgiveness for holding onto it and a willingness to release it forever. Let them see the false comfort their avoidance afforded them, holding true freedom at bay. 

Grant them vision to see that lie dissolved and dismantled in Your holy blood that washes them clean always. Unearth every lie attached to their wound, Lord, even the falsehoods hidden in folds or deeply rooted. Untangle them with Your surgical precision, Great Physician. 

Rescuing Redeemer, awaken my readers to rise up from the injuries and injustices that have bound them in place like Gulliver of Gulliver’s Travels. Release the fire of Your Spirit upon them, enabling them to forcefully arise against the enemy of their soul and awaken the overcomer within them to shake him off. Let them chase after God with a roar on their lips, crying, “No More!”

I plead the blood of Jesus over each reader’s mind, will and emotions. (As you pray for yourself, place each lie under the blood of Jesus and envision that lie nailed to His Calvary cross.) I break the slumber, fear and blindness off readers whose sight obscured the lies binding them. I release heavenly insight and depowering of weariness from carrying that injury. Let them triumph over the lies within them, Lord, for You have made us more than conquerors and Your demonstrated love is our glorious victory over everything (Romans 8:37 TPT). 

Fostering Our Emotional Wellness

Emotional Wellness blog image 2018Today I heard the Spirit say, “foster emotional wellness.” To foster is to encourage or promote the development of something. Synonyms are: stimulate, advance, cultivate, nurture and strengthen. Fostering implies action taken repeatedly over time (maintenance) so advancement occurs.

Emotional wellness is an investment we make in ourselves. It begins with our decision but requires divine help to maintain over time. Our house and garden require constant maintenance. Without it, weeds perform a coup, overtake the landscape and obscure the gardens natural beauty. Jesus provides us tools to maintain emotional wellness: His Spirit, His Word, His local Body and His gifts so that we achieve spiritual health and foster it over a lifetime. 

Therefore, no more licking those wounds, my friend! To lick a wound is to attempt to heal one’s injuries or soothe one’s hurt feelings after a defeat. We are not victims! Why suppress the healing process, dragging it out? How’s that working out for ya? As in the skin ulcer illustration, you must stimulate healthy blood flow to the area (Jesus’s  blood) and use your divinely imparted tools to cut those lies out, apply the balm of scripture to soothe that raw area, covering it in prayer until it heals. “The Holy Spirit is the one who gives life, that which is of the natural realm is of no help. The words I speak to you are Spirit and life” (John 6:63 TPT). 

You can achieve and foster an emotionally healthy heart. We are in a season where lies are being routed out and injustices removed as a Spirit of Justice is being released on the earth. Repayment for injustices is coming in many ways, so believe the Just Judge to bring restoration in your life. “God is settling the books in Heaven by examining where the enemy has over-attacked you personally and also the world. Because of this, injustices are being exposed very quickly right now. The Lord is moving from Heaven upon the injustices that have come against you and we are going to see a shift in the spiritual atmosphere as a result” said said Doug Addison

Won’t you schedule a therapy session with Jesus, today? Don’t procrastinate your misery a moment longer. Your Redeemer King stands holding your hand. Watch the overcome rise within you as you take back the ground rightfully yours, in Jesus name! 

Let’s decree Romans 8:11 aloud over ourselves, “Yet God raised Jesus to life! Gods Spirit now lives in me and He will raise me to life by His Spirit!” 

Change CD image

Change, copyright 2006 by Michael Tyrrell


Musician Michael Tyrell sums up this process eloquently in his song, The Healer.

The entire Change CD is a healing catalyst. I heartily recommend it! 

Categories: Adoption Birthmother Emotional Healing restoration

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Christian author and inspirational speaker of truth that makes the darkness tremble. Author of two non-fiction books at

10 replies

  1. Oh Kate you know how to get me!!. Thank you Holy Spirit for using Katie to help others see it for what it is. When I think I done with something, like you said it raises it head. All that crap with my ex-husband is like a knife in my side some times. I think I’m over it and I will here something on the news or someone talking about a sex offender and it is there. Like that doctor they have been sentencing for weeks now. Why don’t they stop just lock him up he is not coming out period. Maybe they think it is healing for all the victims for them to speak I don’t know. I just remembered this is not private so I’m going to stop after you read this you can delete if you want. I am a work in progress and I’m thankful for the steps I’ve taken even if it is one step at a time. God is with me and His timing is perfect..So thankful for the life I have now for sure.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I’m so glad you can relate to my struggle, yet saddened your wound is being tested. The Lord is telling us to FOSTER our emotional health. Keep the ground we have taken and not relinquish it. Love you!


  2. Beautifully written Kate. My heart ached to know of the grief you were experiencing last week as you prepared to attend the shower. I wish I could have met you for lunch and a laugh or two with a few hugs. I’m sorry Kate. ((((((hugs)))))) I’m happy to know that God is dredging up those old wounds. xoxo

    Liked by 1 person

  3. As your blog post starts out, ‘God Bless the Cracked’ and I also offer this: God Bless the broken road that led me straight to you! (No plagiarism intended)…..Great insight on the emotional healing and skin wound analogy!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. WOW Kate. Written a while ago but you would not know it. It is still speaking truth and is so insightful and speaks directly to the healing i have been and i am still going through. Thank you for putting yourself out there and being a Pioneer for the rest of us.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks, Pat!
      I love you, dear sister. I’m thankful Holy Spirit put me on your heart and that you stopped by to read. Not everyone will understand the various stages of healing we experience, but I know you do. We are overcomers!


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